Cest la vie

Like a super nova, that old life is over.

2012-01-01T22:02:00.000+08:00

I wanna be there someday.

Finally blogging , though i'm suppose to blog yesterday but well , i was knocked out.

As i said at my earlier post , this year was definitely a lesson to be learnt.

Why?

Simply because I saw the cruelty of life.

Just like the darkness befalls on you , diminishing the lights and there you are near the edge , falling fall anytime.

Just when you thought everything was perfect , little did you knew something was approaching , expecting the unexpected.

But then , i was lucky.

Lucky enough to meet him , lucky enough to have her , lucky enough with people supporting.

The truth revealed and it's time to wake up.

It was certainly not easy to make a right decision and definitely not easy to move on.

But i'm glad i had her back in my life again.

Those mistakes i've made , those things i've done , i can't be more grateful she's willing to accept me once again.

I extremely regretted and ashamed for what i've done.

Thank you for letting me in again.

As she said , a clique is a commitment.

And i can say that i've made the right decision to leave.

Frankly speaking , i had never felt so free , so relaxed , so peaceful for years.

At that instant , i felt peace and happiness and i found myself.

Of course , the process is which it almost knock me down.

Letting go is easier said than done , when those memories constantly flows through your mind and slowly drifting back to the past.

Life's a struggle but you have to move on.

But is time could turn back , I just want to be myself.

Though i left , but i gained something even more better : true friendship.

See that ADORABLE girl up there?

She's the one whos there for me , supporting me emotionally.

She's the one who i can get along.

She's the one i can HIGH with.

She's the one whom i hurt too.

But she's the one , who gave me a chance.

Well , not forgetting my class clique, super duper awesome people that i never get tired of.

Jamie the cow , weiting saggy , xinying funsize and valerie the bat.

I still remember all of us studying so hard for n levels but then those times were great where we helped each other ^^

BUT , sad thing is that we haven even took one single neo print in 4 years of our lives.

Let's strive hard for o levels next year and get into jc!

During the past two months , i met great people , for example eric the nice guy.

He never fails to entertain me and listening to my nonsense , ah should have talk to him more during primary school , damn ><

Also not leaving out my crazy partner TEEYUERONG.

I still remember pre-japan trip preparation we were so high and crazy.

Haha , we keep taking lots and lots of photos and you never fail to make me laugh.

And geraldine too!

She's just like me(but i'm not as cute as her) , we share the same mind , so if SOMEONE tries to bully me i can turn to her XD

Last but not least , presenting this cannotdescribebywordsbutsuperduperfreakingawesomethoughabitdumbdumb boyfriend :D

I met him on 16.7.2011.

Never in my life i would meet him because i never considered myself to be in a relationship in secondary school.

Who knows someone might just stole your heart?

The first two months wasn't easy at all , especially all those happenings while coping with exams.

Those were the times which got us stronger to overcome obstacles.

But the last two months i spent with you was great.

Though we might not see each other often this year , i believe as long as the feeling remains the same , distance does not matter (:

I also want to apologize for any mistakes i've made ><

Five months just flew pass like that and going to sixth soon.

As i reminisce the moments we had together while i was awake , i believe everything is going to be worthwhile , even though easier said than done.

ME GUSTA! :D

Seems like there's always someone who disapproves
They'll judge it like they know about me and you
And the verdict comes from those with nothing else to do
The jury's out, but my choice is you

So don't you worry your pretty little mind
People throw rocks at things that shine
And life makes love look hard
The stakes are high, the water's rough, but this love is ours.

A new beginning.

2012-01-01T02:50:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS! WE SURVIVED END OF THE WORLD~
Finally a new year begins , a new start for everyone.
Its 2.46 am right now and I'm wide awake.
Well for me , 2011 has been a lesson to me rather than a fruitful year.
The lessons taught were indeed extremely valuable , especially the mistakes I've made.
But then , i managed to find back happiness and love from the unexpected.
Well still , it's a new year! A new beginning , lets all make it worthwhile :)
Anyway , dinner today was super fulfilling and i finally saw fireworks while counting down at ecp.
Super awesome especially when you countdown with tiffany and yuerong though we couldn't meet xinying and eric amd the rest on time.
Today was really an awesome day :D
AND SOME LAZY BUMBUM IS READING BESIDE ME NOW :P
SHALL BLOG TOMORROW , CIAOS~

All at once everything looks different.

2011-12-19T20:09:00.000+08:00

How does it feels like being there?

Helloo earthlings ~ Gonna have a short update!
Just how long i didn't visit this blog , i guess it has been rotten over the past months.
Everything's going smoothly , satisfied and contented.
Schools starting real soon , i'm gonna work extra hard for 'o' levels next year and strive for many As !
I know it's not going to be easy but it will be worthwhile when the efforts have paid off.
Alrights , gonna avoid all technology-related devices once school starts.
Life is never easy , but as long as we don't give up we will make it through (:
ANYWAY I WANT TO SEE SNOW SOOOO BADLY!! :(((((

Standing here it's all so clear
I'm where I'm meant to be

Life’s not about people who act true to your face. It’s about people who remain true behind your back.

2011-10-16T10:10:00.000+08:00

These past three months have been crazy/hectic/fucked up/worth/unexpected.

With no doubt , i learnt alot of lessons , especially from my past mistakes.

All those dramas let me see through who are the true ones.

I'm grateful to meet some people that really change my life , that really let me step out of the cave and venture.

If not for them , i wouldn't got what i had today.

One year has past , we still got lots and lots of things to do and catch up with our lives.

I don't know how to express my gratitude but i'm really thankful that you didn't let go.

Dramas , conflicts , misunderstandings are the past , we are unable to do anything to make amendments but with the future ahead of us , we cherish each other even more.

I might lost somethings in my life but subsequently , i gained something even much better.

I feel free and great now and i wouldn't want to change anything about it.

Years of hiding myself in the dark hole , now i'm free and happy.

Thanks my dear friends and you , for everything (:

No looking back
I wont regret, no.

Some people are just stupid. They have the best thing in front of them but turn around and go for the worst.

2011-10-10T11:22:00.000+08:00

Not looking back.

'O' level are approaching REAL soon , so wish those taking the best of luck!

Here I am rotting at home , actually i kind of miss school.

I need to get out , someplace or somewhere where i can put my mind at ease.

Staying at home sucks because all those wild thought will be creeping into my mind again.

I can't wait o levels to be over because there is soooo much things for me to do.

Speaking of holidays , i've been trying to persuade my mum to go koreaa.

I WANT TO GO KOREA SO FREAKING BAD.

Like seriously.

I don't go there just because i wanted to see my idols , etc etc.

In actual fact , i really adore korea culture , their language , delicacies,

AND... because i wanted to see snow.

Since japan is out of the list , korea can be taken into consideration.

From young i had this thought that snow is like a sparkle , something so special i had never seen in my life , its something that gave me this hard-to-describe- magical feeling like you are in a fantasy world.

That's also the reason i love cold countries , the feeling of warmth you get when you are cold , when you cuddle with your loved ones , when people got closer together.

So again , i will continue to work hard in persuading :DDDD

Sometimes you have to let go of something to let the better ones come in.

2011-10-07T18:15:00.002+08:00

We will get through this.

N LEVELS ARE OFFICIALLY OVER!!!
LET'S START TO LEPAK!
Well , not so soon yet because we still left 'o' level emath and chinese.
GAMBATTE! Let's just bear for a month more and we can start REAL slack.
After amath paper today went to weiting house to watch pirates of the caribbean and i swear the mermaids are freaking hot.
It's been a long time since we got together besides mugging for exams.
I hope we can get to sec 5 and even jc/poly.
Throughout these months i've learned alot more than i ever expect.
I've heard and seen the worse , experience the pain , going through shits.
Well yet again , this is life , up down left right , the future remains bleak.
We really should cherish those love ones around us now before regrets take over.
Shit happens , life goes on ,
one life , live it.

Hey dear friend , how have you been?
How are you doing lately? Things going smoothly?
It's been few months or almost a year since we talked.
Seems like we have alot to catch up (:

P.S. YOKO IS SUPERR KAWAIII!! :DDDDDDDDDDDD

Cruel reality.

2011-09-14T13:07:00.002+08:00

Always.

Life's a bitch , so is everyone.

Everyday , everyone is trying so hard , struggling in this mad crazy world.

The cruel reality which sets the boundaries makes it hard to break through.

Because of we humans , that makes the world this way.

Selfishness , jealousy , revenge , greed , isn't all these the start of everything?

People bring you down because they want you to suffer , to be miserable , to be sad.

In the end , it's all pointless.

I can rest assured the guilt will built up upon them and what goes around comes around.

Funny things is , sometimes they don't know who they are anymore and unsure of what they are doing.

Where has their soul disappear to?

Where is their conscience?

Why have they become such monsters?

Are they happy by doing this?

What do they gain in the end?

They say why do evil people die so slow? Simply because god want to let them suffer more.

So don't forget karma's a bitch too.

I've met the worse and gone through the bullshits.

Some people said all this happenings its a cycle , well i said this is lessons to be learned.

At least from the process , we learn to open our eyes and ears big enough to see who's the fake and who's the real.

This is what makes us stronger.

Nobody's perfect , nothing's perfect.

People change , things change.

Some change for the worse , some change for the better.

Sometimes we just have to let go of somethings to let the better ones come in.

Never ever judge the book by its cover because you never fully understand one person enough.

The truth will be revealed one day.

The only thing i believe now is , karma.

So go ahead and do whatever that satisfy your crave , go ahead and hurt the loved ones , go ahead and commit your sins , go ahead.

I feel sorry for you because you've lost your fucking mind and soul and you will just be wasting your energy and time on useless stuffs that's all (:

You and I know what it's like to be kicked down
Forced to fight
But tonight we're alright
So hold up your light
Let it shine

Against all odds.

2011-09-11T17:29:00.000+08:00

Cherish those moments while you can.

Okays back go blogging!

A very busy week for me though , busying with n level , preparing for career seminar , going out with my beloved ones.

Finally i can get some rest today x.x

Yesterday went swimming with girls except for mariam cause she had tuition.

I can say it the MOST productive swimming for me because i managed to swim quite a number of laps.

Thanks FANNY and JIEVANDA for motivating me , ya fanny you and your crab dance.

Ate mac and shopped around for our shoes!

Some were nice , some were too expensive but in the end we got it with quite reasonable prices. ^^

Most of the things are on sale and im so tempted to buy but im going to be broke after shopping for career seminar.

Well , i just hope everything goes well on tuesday and be surprised ! XD

Okay after today im not gonna use computer anymore , gonna focus on my n levels and get As , shall party like shit after exams!

Toodles~~

Long live the walls we crashed through
While the kingdom lights shined just for me and you

Long live all the magic we made

And bring on all the pretenders, one day we will be remembered.

Not worth.

2011-09-08T22:56:00.000+08:00

Just smile.

Hello world (:

Decided not to rant on my blog , because its soooooooo not worth.

So lets begin with the day!

Went to visit aishah house for hari raya today :D

Last we went once and this is the 2nd time.

The food and everything was soooo nice.

Played cheat and lost so terribly , it's time to sharpen up my skills again.

Went to playground again and climbed on the spider web and one little boy came to join us , superr cute!

Traveled to paya lebar and gather for bbq and fanny was super epic because she slept throughout.

Romeo: What happen to her?

Me: Oh she very guai , she woke up at 8 in the morning and do housework.

Romeo: ya , so she do once in a blue moon.

Me: YA , DO ONCE IN TEN YEARS.

Had a really fun and tiring day , never felt so contented for so long.

I'm just gonna look beyond imperfections and get on with life.

I'm gonna do my best and not letting anyone to bring me down.

No one , nothing is gonna stop me.

Let today be the day. Stop letting your history interfere your destiny and awaken the opportunity to release your greatest self.

2011-09-07T20:48:00.000+08:00

Time to let go.

Everyday , everyone is just trying to survive in this cruel world.

The endless dramas , pains will always be constantly repeating itself.

People are always constantly bringing people down.

Sometimes isit just because we cared too much? sometimes are we just holding onto something that is meaningless?

Promises , sacrifices , its just a blessing in disguise.

This time im really tired and really fucked up.

I am seriously worn out , i am really tired , i surrender.

I keep telling myself , why because of those selfish and low-life people bring me down?

I told myself everytime i must held my head high and fight against negativity.

Go ahead and do whatever you want , just go ahead.

Im sick of caring , sick of saying , sick of scolding , sick of everything.

In the end , its still meaningless.

Sometimes i think , if we didnt have a start , then all these things would not even happen.

Right now , i really dont give a fucking damn anymore , go ahead and judge , go ahead and do whatever you want.

BECAUSE I DON'T GIVE A MOTHERFUCKING DAMN ANYMORE.

2011-08-30T09:40:00.000+08:00

Forget about the things you think you need & start being thankful for what you have.

Every human being is selfish.

Who doesn't want to be perfect?

Who doesn't yearn for everything?

Who doesn't want things to go their own way?

Things have reached this state.

Clueless , hopeless.

Nevermind , i shall see what's your next move.

But i can clearly tell you that , it's too late for everything now.

I would never ever forget what you've done.

Thanks for succeeding in your plan , because this is what you want.

I really hate you.

Never once knew..

2011-08-28T18:25:00.001+08:00

Trust is like a mirror,once broken you can never look at it the same again.

Firstly , I would like to congratulate you on your failed plan.

Secondly , thanks for treating us as substitutes all the while.

Thirdly , thanks for using us and thrash us aside.

Fourthly , thanks for hurting us.

Fifthly , thanks for giving this cold shoulder.

Lastly , thanks for letting our efforts being wasted.

I didn't knew and never once knew you were this kind of person.

You've changed , totally.

You are not the person I knew before.

Scary , intimidating, strange , frightening , terrifying , this is what you are now.

I don't know you anymore , i don't know who you are.

You've misplaced my trust , you've changed.

I hate you.

We don't pick who we fall in love with and it never happens like it should.

2011-08-28T11:27:00.000+08:00

As i look up at the sky , it gives me the feeling that everything will be alright.

HELLOOO :)
I have been this neglecting this space of mine lately.
Caught up with lots of work and stuffs.
Things have been running smoothly for now , the future is unpredictable because you never know what might happen next.
Well , all we do now is to make every moment counts and make sure we don't have regrets later on.
Okay change topic , recently went shopping with my piggies!
AWESOME SHIT.
Camwhor-ed , ate , shopp-ed , gossip-ed , etc etc.
Haha i could never get enough of them , they always make my day :D

BE JEALOUS :D

My mind goes blank when i'm with you ,

I can't think straight , i can't be normal.

But , every moment spent will never be forgotten.

No matter what happens , we will be strong enough to overcome.

No matter what happens , we still keep our promises.

I was enchanted to meet you.

2011-08-21T11:43:00.000+08:00

Happy first month , finally you've stole my heart.
Firstly , I wanna thank my beloved best of the best friends , fanny , mariam , jievanda , jonathan , jamie and xinying.
Thanks you for your advices , rantings , scoldings, guidance.
I really wouldn't have made it without you guys , really appreciate all your efforts.
Thanks for hearing me out , thanks for being there , thanks for bearing my childish-ness.
Yesterday was really memorable/epic/funny/awesome day for us.
POLAROID ROCKS , THANKS FOR BRINGING , really love it.
Another story just begun , whether it will have a happy ending , let fate decide.
Nobody's perfect , everyone makes mistakes.
But , everyone deserves a second chance , you'll never know if you never try.
Okays , gonna mia again for the sake of n levels , distinctions all the way!! :D

I run my fingers through your hair and watch the lights go wild.
Just keep on keeping your eyes on me, it's just wrong enough to make it feel right.
Lead me up the staircase
Won't you whisper soft and slow?
I'm captivated by you, baby, like a firework show.

Don't know.

2011-08-13T22:06:00.000+08:00

Lost in the middle of nowhere.
Thoughts filled my mind.
Where is this going?
Am I doing the right thing?
Is everything worthwhile?
Am I an idiot?
I didn't know.
I didn't expected this.
I'm not prepared.
I'm scared and worried sick.
Negativity is taking over me.
I'm drowning.
I'm reaching the edge , about to fall off soon.
But , I will endure.
And maybe one day , I will just break into pieces.
And maybe , I'll end this my own.
And maybe , this shouldn't have started at all...

And this is so hard,
Cause I didn't see,
That you were the love of my life and it kills me.

Every moment counts.

2011-08-09T19:36:00.000+08:00

Life has been a roller coaster ride.
Sometimes it just so hard to get on , with conflicts happening everywhere , losing the ones you loved.
Well again , this is life.
Some things , are just not within our control.
But , some things , some words , we just have to do it or say it before everything it's too late.
I too , learnt a lesson , to cherish everyone around me because you definitely cannot expect what will happen next.
There's always another chance to start over again , because we are still here, to make another change.
Life is in our hands , just like how we want it to be.
The decisions always lies upon us , whether we want to make it meaningful or leave with regrets.

Sorry that i couldn't say anything.
Sorry for giving you that look.
Sorry for not able to be there everytime.
My actions shall speak and let you understand.
I always have my shoulder for you to lean on (;

I just don't want to let go.

2011-08-07T23:21:00.001+08:00

This night is flawless, don't you let it go.

Singapore birthday approaching in one days time!
Well , alot of things happened , conflicts all around.
It's just like a cycle , where history repeats itself again.
From those experiences , we always remind of ourselves , not to repeat our mistakes again.
Sacrifices , quarrels , misunderstandings.
Sometimes , its just the matter how are we gonna solve it , face it.
Some things just can't be said later , because we never knew what might happen tomorrow.
That's why , we learnt to cherish things around us, forgive and forget.
But still , the process is not easy , because the scars left behind , will be forever etched deep down in our hearts.
But then , this will remind us of those mistakes , constantly reminding ourselves how did it started and never repeating them again.
Every person has different personalities.
But , we are all human and that's what make us the same.
Life is just like a test and see whether we will able to pass with flying colors or left with regrets.
So now , i just want to thank people around me , for being sacrificing , for being understanding , for being there , for being my reliable.
I'm grateful , to meet these awesome peoples and i can never thank them enough for what they've done , for making my life wonderful.
THANKYOU :D

I've done my best , and i'm sorry.
I'm sorry because i had no choice , i'm sorry because i didnt know what to say , i'm sorry because i only could do with actions.
I just want , to be there for you , to share your burden with me , to overcome your fears.
I just want , to be your pillar of support , I want to be the one you can rely on.
I know what I did was cruel , i force myself to hold back because see you like this , it hurts.
I told myself , to be strong and don't ever cry.
I did it tonight. I did. But , i didn't regret.
Because I just want to make you smile again , because i know that , you'll never know unless you try.
No matter what the outcome will be , i will still be there , supporting you (:

“The naked truth is always better than the best dressed lie”

2011-08-06T09:21:00.000+08:00

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn ,

That's alright because i like the way it hurts.

Just gonna stand there and watch me cry,

That's alright because i love the way you lie,

I love the way you lie.

Once you start a lie , a bigger lie will need to cover the first lie , and then another bigger lie will need to cover up and first and second lie and the cycle repeats.

Where has the truth gone to?

Lies , lies and lies.

I'm sick and tired of it , i'm sick of being deceived , i'm sick of living in my wonderland and being oblivious to the things around me.

Sometimes i just don't know who to believe anymore , who's words to trust.

Trust , hold a very deep meaning.

Trust is like an eraser , it gets smaller with every mistake made.

You struck the lottery this time , congrats.

Like you said , everyone is selfish.

But why , why bother to hide the truth?

I just want to know the truth that's all i asked for.

What has happened has already happened , i just ask for the truth that's all.

I guess you didn't realize that by hiding the truth from me it makes me trust you no more.

Love is selfish , foolish.

Everybody's bound to get hurt and yet you hit the jackpot this time round.

But to my surprise i still held my composure because if i reached the maximum , i don't know what i'll do.

Well , i just blame myself for being stupid to trust your words , your lies , you bullshits.

You still don't know what the fuck you've done.

I'm sorry friends , and thanks for everything.

Thank you.

2011-07-17T23:16:00.000+08:00

M.I.A

Will be back soon~ ciaos!

2011-07-17T00:03:00.000+08:00

Time passed so fast , but the memories will always remain in our hearts.

So , yesterday marked the last official day in npcc.

The last time wearing our uniform , the last time wearing our unit t , the last time taking over the parade , the last time our sec 4 squad spent our time together.

Four years , just passed by like this , another moment we'll all be apart.

All the experiences throughout the years in npcc , has really taught me alot.

From a quiet-shy cadet , now i've became squad instructor , pds head and even attained the best unit cadet award.

Npcc , has really changed me dramatically , all these years i've been through , no one could ever understand.

If weren't for npcc , i wouldn't have met so many awesome people where they are really there for you , where they are really the ones you can talk to , where they are the ones you can work together with.

From this , we foster great bonding with each other , nevertheless we've formed an awesome squad.

Of course, not forgetting the cadet inspectors and teacher officers , for your guidance throughout.

The four years of glory , will never be forgotten , the times we've spent together and those memories will always remain in our hearts.

Firstly i wanna thank my comrades , who are always there for me.

Jievanda- My best comrade! we always worked well together , thanks for being there for me :DD

Fanny- My best partner! Everytime we never failed to get crazy and hyper together!! Thanks for laughing and high-ing with me!!

Mariam- My horny sister! haha , thanks for being HORNY and all the crazy moments!!

Jonathan- My twin! haha , thanks for your jokes that always cracked me up , thanks for being a wonderful guy friend and twin!

Jerrick- Great partner! it's been a pleasure working with you and keep SMILING , yea~

Joel- JOOOOOOOOOOOOO-ELLLL , haha. thanks for cranking us up with ur entertaining acts!

Eugene- CUTE guy! hehe , so quiet and shy but i like working with you too!

Yingzhou- Super duper small kid! Always making funny noises and never failed to crack us up haha!

Huifang- Fierce tigress! The beauty queen of our squad! haha~

Syahirah- Nice girl! Smart and gentle!!

Siti aishah- Cute and reliable! Thanks for the effort put in for march camp!

Tiffany- Crazy girl!! Everytime never fail to be hyper!!~

Aishah- Auntie!! okay la not so bad , thanks for the gossips , always hyper and crazy!

Liyana- Cheerful and funny girl!!

Liana- Not-so-quiet-but-can-scream-very-loud , haha!

Teck cheong- YEA , thanks for the middle finger everytime! please grow shorter!

Sorry if i left out some!

So this is my best-est , awesom-est , crazi-est sec4 2010-2011 squad ever!!

I WILL MISS YOU ALL AND I REALLY LOVED YOU ALL :DDDDDDD FRIENDS FOREVER~

Yeap , so today went out to watch harry potter and the deathly hallows part 2.

IT WAS FREAKING AWESOME!! Highly reccomended!

So , something happened , but shall not elaborate much and also wanna thank the cute 'paparazzi s' for planning this , much appreciated.

Thanks for everything you've done , i really never expected this.

Alrights! Time for photos~

Epic faces everywhere LOL.

SI and BUC.

TOODLES~

Life as we know it.

2011-07-10T02:01:00.000+08:00

Doubt so.

Whoosh , it's been a really tiring and hectic week!

So many things to complete yet so little time.

So many things happened in one go , i guess this is life isn't it?

Yeah , had a great time at ecp today with awesome people.

I guess everything will resume when school starts again , everyone will be busy-ing with their own stuffs and life , walking their own ways.

Prelims in few weeks time , gonna get 5-6 distinctions to have ms ho treat us.

I'm just gonna let everything off my mind and mug like shit.

By hook or by crook , i have to score this time.

So , i guess im gonna be m-i-a for quite sometime.

Bye world (:

I guess history is repeating itself?

Because i'm always the one letting go..

I'm scared and i really hate this feeling.

I asked myself isit because i'm too kind? put in too much effort? until everything just fall apart?

I don't know , i feel i'm taken for granted.

It's okay , i;ve experienced it before , that's why i choose to let go because i don't want to experience this anymore.

I'll be alone , just one person.

Everything just washed away by my tears.

Probably i'm sick and tired of this life , i don't wanna continue anymore.

The saddest part is , i can't reveal my true feelings , i'll just have to put on a fake smile and get on.

Funny thing is , i;ve already expected yet i chose to believe it again.

Haha , how foolish of me.

My mum was right afterall , i;ve learnt a very important lesson.

It's alright , it's okay , you still got yourself , take one step at a time , i believe i'll be able to pull through.

Nothing lasts forever.

Wakeup call.

2011-07-03T10:33:00.000+08:00

Its funny how things can change everything just within seconds.

Life is just so unpredictable.

And we will learn how to cherish everything around us when we lost them.

But , sometimes its just so difficult , so hard , just to accept the truth because we don't even believed what had just happened.

But the only thing is that , it had already happened , we can't turn back time to make amendments anymore.

This was a wake up call to me.

This shows how important everything is to me.

Even though we may have lost somethings , but still live has to go on.

Even if how bad your day is , you just have to get back on track and keep on living.

The meaning of life , is to live it.

So , make the best out of it , give in your everything and most importantly , live with no regrets.

I'm sorry friend , im devastated.

Sorry i couldn't be of much help , sorry for not being able to stand at your position.

Sorry , for what it had happened.

But , i will always be there if you need me , don't push me away.

Stay strong , and smile , i'l always be there for you (:

是否。。。

2011-06-25T16:01:00.001+08:00

If only...

Holiday are BORINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.....

Except for yesterday!

IT WAS ONE HELL OF A TIME at marina barrage with fanny , mariam , vera , jv, jon , eugene , mengqian , jerrick and ernest.

Had a belated birthday treat with ernest , hope you enjoy it! :D

Meet peeps at around ten at bedok mrt and trained all the way to city hall.

The handsome(s) went off to meet V.I.P(ernest) while the babes(girls) went to get the cake!

Walked and shopped around and bought one bracelet!

Camwhor-ed almost everywhere we stepped on and was so crazy with the girls posing with flowers haha.

My stomach was grumbling while waiting for the guys and we were so desperately hiding the flowers away :)

Had a sumptuous buffet and most-looking-forward chocolate fondue~~*yumsyums*

Went outside to 'suntan' and camwhore and vera did planking which failed , LOL.

After lunch we decide to go marina barrage and slack!

Toured around the shopping centre and fanny SCREAMED so loud and almost cried , LOL.

The handsome(s) bought a bottle of champagne and went outside and POP which was super epic fail but vera went home already.

The rest of us went to sat down along the bridge and played " Truth or Dare"!

SUPER DUPER EPIC , FUNNY, EXCITING.

Secrets were being revealed from everyone's mouth haha and Dare was epic , we keep sabo-ing one another.

Played until around 7.30pm and headed for dinner and hom-ed.

Yesterday was so enjoyable since the starting of secondary four where everyone was so busy with their life.

Anyway , i really wanna thank those peeps for making my day , we shall more of this outing :D

Before i go , i need to dedicate something for my twin.

JONATHAN WANTS TO POP MORE SPARKLING JUICE NEXT TIME. (see this jon?)

PIX:

I can't sleep , eat , think properly.

This really gotten me confused when i can't even face this kind of situation.

I don't know why i'm scared , like for real.

But , maybe i thought you've made the wrong decision when it's not really worth it.

Sigh... i kept pondering and now i feel so apologetic.

Sorry and thank you friend.

You've been much help to me , thanks for everything and sorry for letting you bearing the responsibilities.

Love ya bestie :D

Shit happens. Life goes on.

2011-06-18T18:54:00.000+08:00

Happy advanced fathers day.

I know i haven't say it , ILOVEYOU :D

Living with you for more than a decade it's been wonderful , sometimes im just unable to express my gratitude towards you.

I can say i have an extremely great and wonderful dad , he is patient , caring , loving and is like even words cant describe him.

He NEVER slap me ONCE , lol , i know this is out of topic.

But , i slapped him in the heart which makes me remorseful , im sorry , i really do.

Okay , back to topic ............HOLIDAYS SUCKS.

Like seriously , it only makes me wanna SLACK.

Actually i prefer going back school rather than just being lackadaisical and rotting at home.

I like being stress actually , that's what keeps my mind focus.

Well , i've been following my schedule , im clueless whether it is productive.

I am 'school sick' and you CAN'T blame me for that , you should compliment me instead ^^

Life only happens once might as well enjoy it to the end.

It gets really funny when sometimes history like to repeats itself.

But well , we aren't perfect anyway , so its okay to make mistakes no matter how serious they are,

because what is worthwhile is we learn from our mistakes.

Critics appears anywhere , anytime and the reason why people likes to judge is because everyone is different , simple as that.

But even if we are different , i believe everyone could make something out of it , because everyone is unique.

So what if you're ill-fated? so what if you're stupid? SO WHAT?

Nobody's perfect anyway and that's what makes everyone the SAME.

Don't ever make your judgement too quick , don't ever underestimate a person.

What matters the most , is being yourself.

I've made mistakes , i've been laughed , bitch-ed , etc , but life still goes on.

Because we all have to face these kind of situation and that is what brings you down.

But you see , that is also when you become stronger.

If yourself drift towards the wrong direction then i can say that you're being defeated , not by anyone , but YOURSELF.

It's hard to keep those voices away but you just have to keep telling yourself in your mind that you can do it and if you never try , you never know.

This is life and you know you can change it before regretting it.

It's okay , it's alright and move on.

Shit happens , life goes on~

Every ending is another beginning

2011-06-08T21:51:00.004+08:00

YHOZ .
Hmm , i wonder how many people read my blog now , but its okay i blog because its my space to store my thoughts and feelings.
Well , things have been going quite okay i can say , nothing much happened except went shopping with fanny last saturday.
It was certainly a BLAST.
But , before that we went to bv bazaar which was not quite good as last years.
YEAH , went in to haunted house , i banged my head , i was molested , etc.
LOL , quite good effort by the lower sec , especially when the cadets are down there haha.
Linger around for awhile and we went to VICTORIA JUMO.
It was lucky this time we didn't lose our way but was quite astonished by LONG queue but it did not held up long.
All of us were given around 15-30mins to grab all the clothes and stuffs and stuffed in into one bag.
I manged to grab about nine items and so happy i gotten a wallet because i managed to squeezed everything in that particular tiny blue plastic bag although there's one little hole :D
BUT , i regretted throwing away one shirt because that person told us to seal up before we left but it doesn't really matter afterall -.-
Its okay , cause im happy!
Went to take neoprint which fanny pester me for soooo long.
Shopped here and there , went to wasabi--san to fill our stomach and home-sweet-home.

Holidays have been boring lately.
Frankly speaking soemtimes i DO hate holidays.
Because you will start rotting at home , vexed over what should you do , etc.
Well , i've been sleeping , eating , sleeping , eating like as if its my normal routine.
But , starting this week has been becoming more productive as i've been following my schedule :D
Time has flown pass like a bullet train , within such short period we reached june.
It's been quite an expeditious ride over the months.
Well , no matter what , life still goes on.
Time's precious , we just have to grab each and every opportunities because we wouldn't end up in regrets.
Before i end off , C.L.I.F IS AWESOME!
Make me so proud to be a NPCC cadet :D
TOODLES~

Watch me.

2011-05-31T20:42:00.000+08:00

My new obsession.

Holidays had finally arrived!

My ultimate goal for this holiday was to catch up with my work and at the same time make it useful to the max.

Well, for us sec 4s of course would be kind of boring because we had to go back to school.

Yesterday ended 'o level mother tongue paper , paper 2 was rather tricky , paper 1 was DEAD.

Okay , probably 'o' level isn't that scary afterall.

You just go there and take exam paper , thats all really.

Haha , anyway thanks to FANNY a.k.a polar bear , i had an awesome night with her yesterday.

We went on a date catching a night movie.

Lucky her we got a pair of free tickets to watch the movie Animals United in 3D.

I think i broke the record by finishing my dinner in 3 minutes and fanny was calling me , messaging me like mad otw , HAHA.

Ohmygod , lucky awesome shit anyway wanna thank her for treating me drink and paying for taxi fare.

The movie was awesome , EXCEPT , we had night PT -.-

The taxi drove us to the wrong place and we happily thought we reached our destination.

Who knows we got happy for nothing and realized its the wrong cinema.

We rushed around like some mad woman keep cursing on the way FML, LOL.

Yeah , but in the end we managed to make it slightly later although we are not the ones who are late :D

Awesome night anyway , i don't mind experiencing again XD

Come on~

I will prove it , to myself

2011-05-27T20:20:00.001+08:00

"O" level mother tongue in two days time!
Well , i've been preparing , grabbing every chances to consult teacher and did all the revisions i had to.
haha , i remembered me , jamie and xinying skipped class and ran all the way to the back of the staircase and library just to do chinese.
Yeah , chinese , chinese and chinese.
Well unfortunately , teenagers nowadays does not focus on the subject chinese.
Most of them criticized that chinese is hard , chinese the words very chim , chinese very boring.
Basically , what they really need to do is to listen , read and write and why bother whining non stop when you are just remaining stagnant down there?
Come on man , as a chinese , as our mother tongue language we shouldn't be procastinating.
So , be proud that you're a chinese!
Hmm , basically i can say today was quite productive though , because we managed to attend MTSSS and wanted to thank miss ho for not having amath lesson because of us.
Also wanna thank the chinese teachers for sacrificing their time just to clear our doubts and of course my fellow peers who guided me along the way.
But frankly speaking i don't really have the confidence of doing well not because i'm not prepared , not because i'm scared , i think probably it might be some pre-exam syndrome.
But , i will definitely not disappoint the teachers for their hardwork and most importantly myself.
Speaking of disappointment , i'm really disappointed with my mid year results this time round.
I always remind myself not to blame anyone , but myself.
It's true that i had tuition and yet i commit the same mistakes despite several warnings.
It was my fault afterall , for not checking it properly , for not getting the right formula , for not having enough preparation.
Well , all these mistakes could have been avoided , but my carelessness took over.
I might be falling behind , i might be attaining bad results , i might be despised , but i can tell you that , don't ever underestimate a person's will.
I say it , i do it , because i've made a promise to myself , because i believed in myself , because i know that , i can do it.
You can be top for while , but you can't be top forever , because you need consistent work.
I realized i've been very lucky to be given many chances , and now , i've only had one last chance to prove to myself.
I had two months to prelim from now onwards and i will cherish the time i have.
I will work my ass off , i will clear my doubts , and i MUST do it.
okay , before i end off , goodluck those taking o lvl MT on monday!!~~

I have to.

2011-05-17T18:24:00.001+08:00

Holidays are almost over , means more exam is approaching soon.

I guess i can't visit my blog sooner or later.

I guess it's time for me to do something about it.

I guess i'll be leaving my laptop while i concentrate on my studies.

Probably i need somewhere peace and quiet where i can avoid distractions.

Time for me to concentrate , because i can't afford to lose anymore.

Whatever the outcome of the results , i make sure i stand on my feet again , because i've made a promise and will constantly remind myself.

I missed those old days and i admire the old me.
I'm scared but yet i'm looking forward.

It's gonna be okay , the world has not end , the future is awaiting.

就讓我留在輪迴的邊緣
等一道光線

I stop and I ponder..

2011-05-16T18:14:00.000+08:00

300TH POST!

Alrights , today was considered rather fruitful for me.
I crawled out of my bed early in the morning to SEND FANNY'S HUSBAND OFF.
There are fans waiting there when we arrived.
Toured around for awhile before we saw some fans started running towards one direction.
Me and fanny were like blur sotongs so we just followed the crowd.
It appears that there's a van outside and show luo is in it!
We are lucky enough to stand infront and getting ready to get shots of him.
Yeah , the basket bodyguard so fierce man -.-
Well , i guess they were playing tricks on us as the van suddenly drove to another side.
Some fans were in doubt whether to follow but i just grabbed fanny and went!
Yesh! The van is on the other side and yet again we managed to get to the front.
Waited awhile before show luo stepped out of the van and i was raising my hand up high while using fanny's camera to record!
Its freaking squeezing BUT i manage to get a very good shot!
Super happy can , fanny should be jumping up and down.
The fans started crowding around him and running after him and yet again i managed to get a close up shot , MUAHHAHAHHAHAHA.
Okay , i feel sooooooo ACCOMPLISHED.
I realized chasing idol wasn't so easy afterall.
First , please wear friction shoes , so you won't fall when you run.
Second , please have long legs or arms so you can get a good shot of your idol.
Thirdly , make sure you are a good runner so you can catch up with your idol.
Fourthly , make sure you are aware of the situation so you wouldn't miss your idol.
Lastly , please remember to report at the venue at least two hours earlier , because you never know when your idol arrives and leaves.
TYVM :D

2011-05-14T11:35:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY FANNIEEE!!
(Anw , its belated because blogger was under maintenance ytd -.-)

Hehe , so envy of you able to view NC16 movies , my birthday a loooooong distance away~
Yesterday officially marked the end of MYE.
I guess i'm gonna screw quite number of papers , nevertheless , this time round of exam proves me my mistakes and my weaknesses.
I swear i'm gonna work extra doubly hard for prelim , i can't afford to repeat history.
It's alright if i didn't reach my target this time round , but at least i'm aware where are my mistakes :D
Yesterday was FUN.
Our class went for Dialogue in the Dark @ Ngee Ann Poly.
It was a very enriching experience for me.
You get to experience in the dark like a blind person and making full use of your your senses.
My guider was very caring although she has vision disability but she's very professional.
Well , i highly recommend that everyone buys the cookie which is almond and chocolate , its super duperr nice !
So , it ended faster than i expected , everyone was disappointed although we had lots of fun.
Before we left , we took a Polaroid picture with our guider elaine :D
Reached back school at around five plus and went back home to change before going to dinner with fanny , jievanda , mariam and jonathan.
Yeah , i really had phobia of cheese from now onwards x.x
Anyway , HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY AGAIN FANNY !! :D

2011-05-09T17:27:00.000+08:00

I'm hot , aren't i?

I know i am because i'm currently feeling this way !
Im BORED , i finished all the paper 2 in emath tys.
I know i shouldn't be slacking now , but enjoying so many holidays wouldn't you feel slacky?
Tried jumping onto different blogs , but people don't seem to blog nowadays after having facebook , well , seems like we'll be missing stories!
I still remember blogger was a hot sensation.
I remember i created my very first blog when i was secondary one , imma noob man.
yeah , after that my friends used to spamm my tagboard but now its being spammed by ROBOTS!
I also remember whenever we posted something about someone we will try to pry out who is the person.
haha , good times , okay im being random.
I feel guilty when everyone's studying and im slacking here (?)
I don't know, i really can't study in the afternoon , i get distracted.
im a nocturnal person , because i find peace at night.
Well , i can't live without afternoon naps so that i have ample energy for the night.
My style was always bringing homework home to finish then continue my revision.
All because i can't concentrate when i'm outside or something.
My attention span is SHORT , so don't expect anything from me~
OMG , 21 more days to o level chinese , sigh...
argh , neglected chinese while busy-ing with MYE , HOW??!!
i think i better work with chinese everyday until i go crazy HEHE~

I hoped , i dreamt , i prayed.

2011-05-05T19:13:00.001+08:00

Yohoo!
back to blogging , three papers down!
I think screwed my chinese today , i really sucked at that.
My language is rolling down the hill , i need to provide friction to prevent it.
I guess i neglected chinese because my focusing more on my science and maths and CHINESE O LEVELS IS JUST FREAKING 25 DAYS !!
Okay , i'm still alive and well , so... i better get started to noting down words etc.
English oral was epic , i totally threw my face away.
Well , i almost left without doing CONVERSATION topic.
That was so embarrassing when i even got two teachers staring at me thinking: what the heck is this girl doing?
I think they probably laughing inside x.x
Fine , so what? its OVER.
Well , once in a five years election is approaching fast in a few days time!
Probably teenagers does not place their interest in politics and election , but minority of them does.
Singapore may be a small country , surviving with insufficient natural resources but we are lucky to have a government that made singapore progressed over the years.
Basically , even though the parties voice out their concerns to people , coming up with plans that will make singapore a better place i still think that people should not always be relying on the government.
Of course that might be some issues that cause controversies , but still , everyone makes mistakes , we can't always be blaming the government.
Although there might be quite number of opposition parties , criticism will always be made , pointing out what PAP had not fulfilled over the years.
People should not listen , but instead look at what the government contributed over the years.
I'm siding neither one of them , but we must see actions , improvements , results , instead of just listening blindly to ' talk but no action' words.
At the same time , we should not constantly blame the government that they did not cater to some of our needs.
But , i believed we also play a part to be independent instead of pushing blames.
The government might be a civil servant , but they are not our maids , they can't afford to look after us every single second , they have their duties to fufil in regards of our national interest and singapore is so small , we need to progress.
So are you telling me that if workers party won the election , you guys are gonna blame them in another five years time what they didn't do like what you did to the PAP now?
People are always supporting without having second thought , constantly blinded by what they heard.
Isn't it corresponding ?
Subsequently , i believed as 'kiasu' and 'kiasi' singaporeans , most of them will review the about the politics and make a wise decision.
but seriously , VOTE WISELY.
This years election is competitive , different parties wanting citizens to vote for them , but this really concerns each and every singaporeans future and even your children , what they might be facing.
Just because of some great comments or speech doesn't mean that it may bring benefits to you , so once again , VOTE WISELY.

2011-04-24T22:12:00.000+08:00

HOT

is the only word that describes my current mood NOW.
what's with sg's temperature nowadays?
ohhh right , the first paper is tomorrow , due to some reason or excuses , im not physically/mentally prepared.
frankly speaking im not even prepared for this exam , im sure most of the people would agree with me.
i had no idea , so don't attempt to question me.
anyway , went to bedok point to study with jon and fanny.
we are suppose to submit a composition on the spot to mr phoa.
was able to concentrate as i took around three hours to complete my essay :D
my only problem was my sentence structure and phrasing , i just hope i would be able to correct these mistakes tomorrow.
once again , thanks fanny and jon for helping me edit my essay , you guidance is indeed helpful :D
lastly , GOO LUCK FOR MID YEAR EVERY ONE :DDDD

Will i be able to..?

2011-04-23T09:36:00.000+08:00

Wahhahahhahaha!
Exams coming in few days and i'm here blogging.
Nothing much about this week , but i dont know why i feel so freaking shagged.
I was able to survive monday and i rolled down the hill from Tuesday onwards.
Well , it feels kinda weird without having NP training although all of us wants to study.
I can say i'm very much looking forward to november , BECAUSE THE JAPAN STUDENTS ARE GONNA INVADE OUR SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Have to plan a one-day program for them , so will be starting right after the papers , i really hope they will enjoy their stay here :D
AND WHY IS SG SO HOT NOWADAYS?
okay enough , its exams exams , gonna get down to studying!
ciaos~!

What if...

2011-04-17T12:23:00.000+08:00

ATC 2009

MY AWESOME BUNCH OF SQUADMATES :D

Time past within a blink of eye ,

soon we will be stepping down from NPCC ,

from then on , everybody will lead heir own individuals lives ,

but i believe our passion still remains the same.

an update of whats happening now ,

basically its still the same just that speech day just ended last week and its awesome~

now , i've been catching up with my studies , preventing myself from sleeping in class although i slept at 2 almost everyday and my tuition teacher said i've improved! :D

i aimed to get A for emath and A1 for chinese.

Its a must no matter how many times i retake!(touchwood , LOL)

i admit i was once a lazy bum , but now things changed because i knew i had limited time.

everybody's working extremely hard now , so i cant afford to lack behind.

i've made a promise to myself , and i will always remember that very moment , which keeps me driving on.

i may not be smart , i may not be perfect , but i know what exactly im doing and i know what benefits me.

okay , enough of these because you may get bored reading it :D

So , yesterday went to tampines library to study with polar bear and panda.

shopped at popular because we were really lacking of stationeries.

within two weeks , my foolscap paper finished , my pen ink have drawn out , im lacking of correction tape refill , etc etc.

you see what the school had done and now we are only splurging our money on stationeries ,

say bye bye to my money TT.

we managed to get seats although the library was crowded.

the best part was i brought the wrong homework but at least i did what was written on my schdeule.

THANKFULLY , i was able to concentrate , because that wasn't me previously.

now , i found my room was a total distraction , i cant stop going facebook , twitter , tumblr , or whatever.

at least when im outside , i can indulge myself in my own world and concentrate better.

but , i was having twitter 'war' with polar bear , HEHE.

study for around two hours plus , we went icing room with fanny for her mum's birthday , awww so sweet..~

shopped around and home sweet home~

MYE , arriving in two weeks time , im DOOMED!

Now, i wonder ...

if everything will go back to what happened last time?

im am somehow scared , lost ..

what if it really happens?

COSPLAY~

2011-03-26T22:12:00.002+08:00

EDITED/

Today had our DURARARA/DOLLARS shoot :DD

woke up at around 7.45am , prepared and went out to meet siya first.

well , basically i was holding on to a pole for my cosplay and everyone kept staring.

reached esplanade at around nine and only me , siya and khai khai(photographer) was there.

others came around later on , gathered together and went to nearby toilet to change.

thanks reika , seira and siya for helping me to makeup.

tried on my first ever passionate brown contacts just within few minutes , wow , and it feels really uncomfortable.

after that we walked a distance to shaw tower for photoshoot , make-up for around two hours but sadly after that we were chased away.

the photographers decided to shoot at outram park , so we took bus to there in our COSPLAY outfit , yes everyone stare again ^^

reached there and went to car park for shoot.

mai was so small and adorable , cant believed she's sixteen.

and jessica was doing her poky advertisement , haha.

the wind there was really big , ruining my wig -.-

but , THE SHOOT WAS AWESOMEEEEEEEEEE

did different poses , shooting with different people the shoot was really great.

kept playing with one of the photographers , played staring game and i was being teased by them @#$%^&

and also kappamond's video: resident talk cock session and he's probably gonna post the videos on facebook.

continued shooting until five before we left for chinatown.

everyone was tired and shagged , because everyone skipped their lunch!
so we went to hand-in-the-pan to buy soy tickets and went to dinner afterwards.

me and siya went to buy subway and something happened x.x

went to mac , chit-chat here and there and left for the mrt.

train-ed to city hall with siya , matt and jessica to funan to pre-order their shirts den home-sweet-home~

today shoot was really enjoyable and awesome.

i wanna thank all the DOLLARS people , jessica for helping to do saikang job and advertising your pocky , siya , seira , reika , matt(shizuo) , HP and most importantly....
the PHOTOGRAPHERS , thanks for the treat and waiting for us , arigatou gozaimatzu~~

AND AND AND , khai khai(photographer) is from my school and he is in NPCC batch 2000-2004 , OMGOMGOGMOMGOGM *FAINTS*
the world is so SMALLLLL!!! :DDD

Back to basics.

2011-03-21T23:04:00.001+08:00

THOSE SCARS ,

I STILL FEEL IT AS THOUGH IT JUST HAPPENED MOMENTS AGO.

Life.

2011-03-16T20:42:00.000+08:00

Time has come to make me realized , whats reality , whats worth for.
Knowing who's th real one , who's the fake.
As life goes by , more and more walls , waiting for you to knock down.
Rantings , i had enough.
Accusations , i've already gotten used to it.
Bias-ness , i've seen enough.
All these had been common to me.
All those bad memories , are forever etched to my mind.
The feeling of sorrow , the feeling of being wronged.
Crying silently in bed , pretending nothing happened the next day , thats how i overcome it.
But , thats when i grow stronger step by step.
That's when i became more mature , that's when i became awake from my fantasy world.
At least i know that my conscience are clear , at least i know that im not committing any crimes.
Truthfully , im really grateful that i still have a shelter , still have everything i need , i really don expect much more.
But still , i know there's something lacking.
It feels strange , feels empty.
I know i can never see it happen , because its a fact and it will never change.
I know that , im being hated , not being accepted , but im trying my best.
I know my past wrongdoings have disappointed you , but still im your kin.
I only need that trust , to mark my existence to you.
But i guess i don't need anymore.
Because im tired , im tired of these craps , im tired of these unnecessary stuffs , im tired of trying.
Its okay if you guys are one sided , i dont care , because im tired.
Go ahead , go ahead and pamper him , just go ahead with what you all want.
I've always been alone , so im used to it.
I know im always making things worst but i think even if one day i just lay silently on my bed no one would bother.
I just want to tell you that , next time in the future i shall see who's gonna walk out and who's gonna be the one staying.
Its okay , everyone changes.

P/S Thanks for hearing my rantings just now , thanks for the words :D

就让我一个人去痛到 ,
受不了想到快疯掉死不了就还好...

Back to square one.

2011-03-13T18:39:00.000+08:00

I.....really hate this..

Back from march camp!
Its totally awesome , thanks to siti and eugene for the hardwork and also not leaving out all the CLs effort they've put in , thank you so much for making this camp successful.
This , is my last NPCC camp , together planning as a squad , together as a whole unit , i really cherish those moments together.
well , of course there were cock-ups and miscommunication because there always bound to be , but nevertheless , its over.
Well , i can say that i learn quite a few things from this camp , although im not in charge of anything , i did my best to help out here and there.
Slacked @ macs with usual group , really high-ing and everyone laugh until their tears were squeezed out.
Had a great 3 day 2 night camp , i really wish i can continue on with the camp , but sadly its over.
Well , we will always be the most awesom-est people! :D

I .. really hate this feeling.
maybe isit a phobia..?
This is why , i dont like to go home , the feelings just bugs me and haunting me as and when it like.
For some reasons , im scared.
i felt useless , i felt im always breaking my promises , disappointing people.
i tried , i tried to get moving on , but something just stops me.
i hate it , really , i tried to ignore , but still..
i thought , after these few days u would change , i guess i was too naive..
I've tried....

What's wrong?

2011-03-02T22:22:00.001+08:00

Okay , results time.

its only uses four words to describe :

FUCKING PIECE OF SHIAT :D

yes , it is indeed.

i've already expected that i will not fare well for this common test , but still , i've underestimated it.

its seems like 2011 is worse than 2010.

2010 is just the starting , and i have lost half of the battle.

i remember , the time that i was rejected , it was really a blow to me.

from that , i learnt that not everything is not what we always expected , instead , you should work hard for it.

but , sometimes its really hard to get up when you fell so hard on the ground.

it just feels , the whole world is gone , leaving an empty space in your heart.

i know i couldn't expect much , because i know how i work.

as time passes , you really see the cruelty of the world.

example , teachers being biased , friends dtiching you one side , teachers accusing people ,

well , aren't these things are common , just that we are not used to it?

its really interesting as you get to see even this type of people exist in the world , gradually you fell feel pathetic and sad for them.

the pros will be one side , the noobs will be another side.

but you can clearly see the difference , what kind of character do they have.

if they are just gonna stay in their world , studying non-stop , not interacting socially , what kind of character will they develop?

because if you think , every first impression of a person matters to them , don't you think so?

its the way you speak , you move and how you handle things.

but some people just not understand the meaning and ditch those values aside when this is what a human should possessed.

but what can i say? the only one who loses out is them.

well for me , at least i can say that im mature than those people , at least i know whats right and wrong.

as for studies , i can only find ways , to improve , plan , and figure out my mistakes.

i know that i disappoint people, especially to myself.

im clearly aware that because this year is critical thats why pressure is upon us.

i know , i know , i know , thats what i always tell myself.

i sometimes ponder , why did my motivation gone?

sometimes i thought of my past , how in the world i acheive those results that i never acheive before?

i really admire my past self , overcoming challenges and the fire burning within me , giving me the strength , but i really wonder where have they hide to?

i feel lost at times , i feel less inferior , i feel lonely , i feel fear.

sometimes i even hate myself for the reason why am i being this way , what really happened to me?

but , i guess this time i found out the answer.

every failure doesn't mean its the end of the world , it means you've gotta try harder , dont be afraid , be who you want to be.

i know i cannot be anyone else , because im me , because im special , because in this world , there is only one me.

critics are common , therefore , ignore them and do your own way , have your own style , portray yourself , show them what you've got.

i might hiding in a hole , but one day , sooner or later , i will be digging out of the hole , unleashing my potential , standing with pride.

and i promise that day will come.

Pretty, pretty please
Don't you ever, ever feel
Like your less than
Fuckin' perfect
- pink

im sorry :/ but im trying my very best :(

Go away.

2011-02-27T12:02:00.000+08:00

Common test is officially over!

BUT... more to come , so dont be too happy yet.

maybe catching I AM NUMBER FOUR next week , hopefully , because that movie looks gorgeous.

this common test overall , i must say i didn't put in my best effort , even if i put in , there will always bound to be mistakes.

gonna mug-mug-mug from monday onwards , can't afford to slack anymore , i must have the sense of urgency , must be kiasi , kiasu but not kiabor.

so , yesterday went to ecp with np cliques.

checked out various locations for the upcoming event.

walked and went HIGH with fanny , maybe next time we shall buy naughty g.

walked for around 2-3 hours , i think we all had lost 1 kg.

went to popular and shopped @ parkway parade.

had an awesome-tiring-high day , i wish these feelings will not fade away.

I'm so fucked up with your fucked up attitude.

a message of apology will not solve anything.

stop acting so big when you are not even doing anything.

stop hiding behind like some stupid turtle and dont even know how to stand up for your rights.

whats the point of pleasing someone for the sake of it and not yourself.

if you measure status is higher than character , then you are really wrong , because why?

you are already wrong from the start.

you said to me this word , but i guess it doesnt even exist to you even for once.

2011-02-19T12:07:00.001+08:00

YOHOO!
Life's been great with homeworks . i think without them we will be the most happiest people ever!
Common test coming up , i really have no idea what kind of results i would get.
been extremely sleepy nowadays since i've been sleeping at 1 am.
i've also been seeking the solution to keep awake.
coffee , sugar , pinching , slapping none of it really is effective.
i have to get on track , no more losing of signs , no more distractions.
i think i shall isolate myself to one corner and concentrate.
I found it very funny when i came upon my blog
the moment i saw my tagboard i will ROFL.
because majority of my previuos post is all about ranting.
and those random comments the robots made is ...

Pamela Anderson: Very useful information. I appreciate your effort, very well written article.
SauraNice: this is not stupidity. but this is future�. of google
SarahNice: Definitely, what a splendid website and informative posts, I surely will bookmark your blog.All the Best!

HAHAHA!! not trying to be sarcastic or what , but im really AMUSED.
anyway , to those people out there , especially my darlings , JIAYOU , i know you all are stressed , but hang on ! :D Good luck guys ^^

Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference. ~Winston Churchill

Well , can you stop being so contradicting?
Endless complaining , criticizing people.
Your results does not determine everything , because your attitude SUCKS LIKE FUCK.
Clearly shows you that you are extremely pampered thats all.
Such a hypocrite , get a life man , you dont even how REAL and CRUEL society is , i doubt you are gonna survive with this kind of attitude.
Just you wait , i make sure you GO DOWN ON YOUR KNEES one day , just you wait ,
i say what i meant.
I may be a pushover , but you haven witnessed the REAL me yet , i dont give a fucking damn how much help you have ,
at least im satisfied and contented with what i got now , at least im not pampered , at least im more INDEPENDENT AND MATURE than you.
Grow up 3-yr-old kid .

Ciaos~

2011-02-16T21:14:00.000+08:00

Homework + common test + remedials = bang the wall :D
had been really really shagged this whole week , sleeping around 1-2am.
everyone's struggling with school work , everyone's busy and everyone's shagged.
but the problem is we cant run away from reality , whether we are taking o or n levels this year.
naturally teachers will expect more.
sigh , but we need to just hang on , hang on even if how difficult isit to overcome.
we cant always have things in our way , so we might as well just do it to our best.
jiayou peoples! good luck for ct1 next week ^^

2011-02-07T20:57:00.000+08:00

WARNING :
The following post below is not suitable for those who are still in new year mood ,
it will spoil your mood if you read it.
please think carefully before reading , tyvm ^^

"Self-respect is the fruit of discipline; the sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself.”
Abraham J. Heschel

Respect , is the most basic of the values of all.
From young , we learn to respect our parents , our siblings , peers , teachers , elders.
We all know that , even strangers we've met , we give our respect , when someone passes away , we give our respect to them too.
Of all the people i've seen , i just met one bitch , who does not fufil any of those criteria above just recently.
Well , basically , this bitch was a TEACHER.
yes , a teacher , like any other teacher who teach students.
To my surprise , she does not even know what is basic respect.
Oh my god , thats certainly shocking.
Well let me tell you what she had done.
Firstly , she's pampered.
Why? because she kept complaining here and there , saying that she cant do even the simplest things of all.
She can't even wash vegetables , she can't even bother to cook.
Hmm.. i wonder why would she even eat first?
She also can't even let people sit in her car.
Oh gosh , are you telling me that your car is infested with germs , that we can't even touch?
So you must have not wash your car for ages then , well well , because you are just PAMPERED.
Secondly , she's a big mouth.
Well , people usually talk with a lower tone , why bother to RAISE your voice when everyone can hear?
So .. you are telling me that you wanted to strain your voice or you want to burst people ear drums?
Oh my god , such a wicked woman , how can you harm innocent people just like that , there are even babies around , omg , you are a killer!
Thirdly , she's racist.
She matters when you came from.
Such a racist girl , people live in harmony together , so are you saying you want to destroy peace and create conflicts?
Fourthly , she had no patience.
Patience is a virtue , did you not hear that before?
Driving off without telling people , what a rude girl.
Just imagine you are waiting for some guest of honor and you just walk off like that , imagine what impression would you give to others.
Fifthly , she look down on people.
Oh man , you are a teacher , how can you look down on your students?!
And you even have a daughter , so you're telling me that you are looking down on your OWN daughter?
I wonder how will your daughter survive in the near future.
Finally , she's a bloody damm fucked up bitch ^^
Saying such things the moment you open your mouth.
I know your mouth contains GOLD , but please keep those words to your fucking big mouth , you're just simply acting like a dog barking non-stop.
Trying to teach your daughter not to get bullied next future?
please man , LOOK AT YOUR SELF , are you even setting a good example?
When the fucking hell we bullied you?
please tell me how many bloody times you come back?
Complaining to us that we kept giving you things to do.
PLEASE , EVERYONE IS DOING THEIR PART , NOT ONLY YOU.
really , get your fucking facts rights before you bark.
even the simplest things you want to complain , wow , nice , just shows that how WEAK you are that you cant even wipe your ass after you shiat.
Concluding that you would die after doing all this?
well, are you DEAD YET?
if thats the case , i wont mind chopping off your body to feed those hungry animals out there , see im using it to do meaningful deeds , you should THANK me instead.
If you are so scared to die , then DONT COME BACK , shoo , go away then , NOBODY will welcome you back.
So what you have car and house ?
What only matters is HEALTH , WHO GIVES A FUCKING SHIT ABOUT YOUR PROPERTIES , THEY ARE JUST A PIECE OF SHIT AND NON LIVING STUFFS THATS ALL.
I wonder why are you judging people regardless when they come from?
Why? because you are just simply JEALOUS.
I bet you ate too much VINEGAR that cause your MOUTH to ROT until you can't even speak properly.
You cant even wait for a second and expect us to locate where the fuck are you?
SO WHAT IF YOU HAVE A CAR ? DRIVING OFF AS FAST AS YOU LIKE.
Well , go ahead and drive as FAST as you can , SPEED all you can , sooner or later you will met with an accident.
For god sake , you are a teacher , spitting out those words as and whenever you like.
so are you telling me that your parents never educate you enough? Are you telling me that ministry of education haven gave you enough knowledge?
well let me emphasize again , you are a TEACHER.
everyone else will be looking up to you , watching your every moves and words.
you can't even set the simplest example and respect , what gives a the fucking respect to respect you.
Opening your mouth like some fucking machine gun , you don't even give people a say.
If i had a chance , i would really hurl vulgars at you , give you a tight slap and give another kick in your bloody damm ARSE.
you are just simply a DISGRACE to all the teachers .
Well you dont have to RAISE you voice when you open your big mouth.
Comeon man , not as if we are DEAF.
well , how about next time i prepare thousands of mics for you to speak?
you want to compete in shouting? BRING IT ON!
i shall who can shout louder ^^
teacher ? you call yourself a teacher?
My FOOT! this kind of attitude , you can just simply GO AND EAT MY SHIT.
Mother? you act like a mother?
My ARSE! This kind of example , you can just simply GO AND BANG THE WALL!
Criticizing us beyond the limits.
im fucking WARNING you now , next time i see you , you better watch out , GET YOUR FUCKING EYES OPEN BIG.
Dont ever think we and young you can just humiliate us like that.
This is way too much , you are WAY too much , beyond the limitations.
We are mature teenagers , dont you think you can bully us just like that , dont ever think you are rich or anything you can just insult people and act free on your own will.
Im gonna slap you , curse you , shout at you , hit you , I DONT FUCKING CARE , i stand up for our own rights , I ALSO DONT FUCKING CARE IF YOU ARE OLDER THAN ME OR WHATSOEVER.
Grow up man really , GROW UP , WAKE UP.
30+ years old already , still act so immature , acting like some SMALL and WEAK GIRL.
AND YOU STILL NEED A 15 YET 16 YEAR OLD GIRL TO TEACH YOU ALL THIS?!
omg , you BEYOND HOPE , HOPELESS! HOPELESS YOU GET IT?!
wake up , or you want me to give you a slap?
GET.A.LIFE , you fucking bitch!
Well , i just pity those students under you , i think complaints will start coming in SOON with these kind of three-year-old attitude.
I don't even see whats the point of you becoming a teacher when you possess this kind of shitty attitude.
well , i shall judge you as a BAD teacher instead?
teaching students to be RUDE , BITCH then?
then i shall say you have done an EXCELLENT JOB *claps claps*
Respect? Responsibility? Setting a good example?
I DONT SEE ANY OF THOSE IN YOU , I REPEAT , I DONT SEE ANY OF THOSE IN YOU.
You are just a fucking pampered-selfish-rude bitch that dont have any manners , i just wonder how your parents taught you.
HAH , you are just disgracing your family , who cares if you're not giving any ang paos?
I DON GIVE FUCKING SHIT ABOUT YOUR HELL NOTE , i think thats meant for your FUNERAL ^^
Gossip and insult whatever you like , because if you're gonna do that again , you will GET IT from me the next SECOND.
i say it , i do it , im being very kind enough to give you face that time , or maybe next time i should RIPPED OFF your face and feed the wild boars?
I think you dont even understand the simplest a-b-cs , because the words coming out from your mouth are just shitz.
you're just simply a FAILURE , not only in life , in teaching too.
Hmm , i shall have a nickname for you , how about...crow?
Because it just croaks whenever they like , and you just look like one ^^
sorry didnt mean to insult crows , im just saying as an example~

well , enough ranting about this bitch , i think she just has low IQ thats all , or maybe she needs medical help because she is so stressed up , maybe i would see her in the mental hospital next time ^^

Results.

2011-01-22T11:53:00.001+08:00

Edited/

Somehow , someday , will we be able to reach our goals?

i quite vexed now , homeworks piling up like milestones , including other personal stuffs.

i dont know am i doing the right thing now.

i just felt that im disappointing everyone , especially myself.

im not even living up to my own expectations , so what about the goals i've set?

everything has planned so well , so perfect , yet i couldnt fufil it.

i feel like a junk now , i've got everything i had , every aid i need , but i just disappoint them in the end.

this should be a wake-up call to me now , stop wavering about other thoughts , im gonna prove that master wrong , that im not easily distracted.

the world is cruel , even humans.
what they look is results and they will flatter you , bootlick , etc.
those that are exceptional will be left one side.
all these years , i've been trying to reach what my sibling have achieved.
because i wanted to prove that could do it , i wanted to follow them.
unfortunately i failed , TWO times and my soul was gone.
i cried , but whats the use?
i only could blame myself , for not working hard , for slacking , for whining.
i picked myself up again , but then now im back to square one.
sometimes i really detest myself , thinking why am i not as smart as my sibling? why cant i possess the abilities they have?
and , the only word in my dictionary was useless.
im stupid , yet im hardworking , im a slacker , yet i know when to play and when to study , i only talk , yet i do it , i whine all day , yet im trying to be perfect.
to achieve something i must take the first step.

not about words but its your actions matter most.

i've failed two times , but that doesnt mean i cant get up.

i will move on , i will go beyond my limits , i will fufil my expectations , and most importantly , not to disappoint myself.
i will prove to others giving them the message that DONT EVER FRIGGIN LOOK DOWN ON ME! IM NOT A STUPID , DUMB , USELESS GIRL , GET A LIFE TO THOSE PEOPLE , I MUST AND I WILL PROVE TO YOU ONE DAY , YOU JUST FRIGGIN WAIT!

now i just wish i can retrieve my soul back..

SCREW IT

2011-01-10T20:08:00.001+08:00

Im seriously gonna rant out this time.
whats wrong with the teachers ?
throw us everything like so damm freaking last minute expect us to clean all this shit.
hello , we still have remedials , o & n levels this year.
its only the beginning of the year yet you want us to start in this kind of manner?
do you really think we have so much free time , to entertain you?
do you really think it is very fun to push everything to us so last minute?
when we do it , you criticize , when we never do , you scold us.
so what now? so last minute expect us to do the job nice and clean.
wow , so yo're implying that you are treating us all as robots?
fantastic , how i wish i could be a robot too , but NO.
we are still humans , we have our own things to settle , our own lives.
we are not here , to be your maid or whatsoever.
i repeat , we are HUMANS , not ROBOTS.
get your facts right before spamming us any shit.
screw the world man.

ENDURE!!!

2011-01-05T18:48:00.000+08:00

SUP peoples , its been two days since school reopens.
what i can say is OMG.
its only the second day and teachers had been bombing us with 'n' & 'o' levels stuff.
got so scared after hearing by just imagining taking the paper.
well , we just have to START and STOP talking now.
these week has been extremely busy , non-stop meetings and sec one orientation.
im lacking of sleep , im going to school everyday with one extra double eye-lid.
i just need SLEEP and that is all i asked for.
this year , is gonna be a critical year.
'o' level results will be releasing next monday , we shall see how our seniors have fared ,
and how we can improve and be much better than them next time.
homework , homework , homework , revision , revision , revision , tution , tution , tution.
these will be my daily routine and i just gotta endure for two more years and it'll be over.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to slap or pinch myself during lesson when i fall asleep regardless at home or school.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to keep on track on my work.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to not slack throughout the year.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to spam question whenever i have doubts.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to work doubly hard for this year and next year.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to stick to my own schedule without fail.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to manage my time well.
i ~~promise~~ MUST to not sleep until i finish my work no matter what time.
i ~~promise~~ MUST depend on myself no matter what.
i ~~promise~~ MUST not care about what others think.

i MUST fufil my expectations , if not someone please knock me with a hammer XD
dont know why but i have a really BAD feeling ,
but its okay , we shall just carry on with live!~
JIAYOU SINSIN!!!~

2011-01-03T18:59:00.002+08:00

SCHOOLS STARTING AND I HAVE YET FINISH MY HOMEWORK.
i'm just so awesome babe , i left 4 compositions to write , say goodluck to me x.x
anyway , whats with the people?
first day of school so many meeting , think we very free meh?
okay , enough ranting
CIAOS~

what matters to me now

2010-12-31T20:38:00.000+08:00

Okay , i know its gonna be 2011 in a few hours , but..

i just want to summarize what happened during 2010.

Basically i think that 2010 was certainly a great challenge for me.

Im a not-easy-adapt girl , so i cant adapt to changes quickly.

of course , throughout 2010 was a roller coaster , running up and down.

but then , you realised and discover people and things changes.

for people , some of them gradually became from bad to worse , some you realised they had potential.

different people have different mindset , personalities and characteristics.

thinking back , you can clearly see the drastic changes and maybe you wouldnt even want to believe it.

well , things have not-so-been-going-smoothly for me.

for example , taking over npcc unit and student council.

thats when you need to strike a balance between your studies and family.

because you dont know how these things are going to change , and how are these things are going to affect you in a good or bad way.

for now , i thought that some of these things and peoples had taught me how to become more mature , how to handle things more properly , how cruel this world is , how to stand up for my rights.

well , i dont really have a resolution for 2011 yet , but typically will be scoring well for my O/N levels next year.

next year , another new big beginning , obstacles posing along the way , everyone's going for the same goal , but the most important is how are you going to do it.

okay , enough of me winding ,

now , i wanna thank these peoples for making my life worthwhile ~

firstly , my beloved classmates!!~~

Xinying: the smallest girl of our clique (not to be insulting) , well basically we can be HIGH and LOW at times , sometimes we do share the same goals , thats what i like , lets jiayous for next year.

Weiting: saggy!!! haha , the great in emath and geo girl. THANKS for your coaching in math and ur saggy-ness , poor thing everyday never fail to be raped by me , anyway sometimes we do have the same thoughts , jiayous next year!

Valerie: the pro the both maths girl , hope you're doing fine in shanghai , and also thanks for coaching me in math , you had alot of patience , thanks for your high tolerance , jiayous for next year!

Jamie: AHOSHI! you , the blur queen of all. anyway , thanks for always being my listening ear , thanks for being there and your contribution to the class also , CHAIRMAN. jiayous for next year , i know we can do it!

Siya: the anime freak and dino's wife !! you this crazy duck , the loudest girl in class. anyway , thanks for always lending your work to me , looking forward to cosplay with you next year! GANBATEH!!

Next , will be my fellow beloved NPCC comrades~~

Jievanda: my best partner and comrade ever! yes , we do things together everytime and perfect.

i just want to tell you that i LOVED working with you. Thanks for standing by my side always , encouraging me in both cca and studies , i could never thank you enough , you are seriously my best partner ever , jiayous for Os next year , we still have a long way to go :D

Tiffany: well , all i can say that jiayou for ur Os next year , being in 4e1 is not easy at all , you still have alot to catch up , put ur priorities right and do well for your studies.

Fanny: you this crazy silaobu!! HAHA , love ya so much , long time never touch you liaos~ hehe , you ar so many scandal , uncountable. well , thanks for helping me when im busy , i feel bad at times. thanks for being hyper with me , thanks for making me laugh , thanks for your food , all i can say you are my best mum ever!! jiayous for next year , we still have alot of things to do after we graduate :D

Mariam: sup sis! you ar, the most vulgar girl , everytime own people , haha. anyway , i had a really great time throughout all those parades taking the sec one squad with ya , its been a splendid time. thanks for your crazy-ness with me and all those inside jokes. jiayous for next year o level !!~

Jonathan: the glutton! haha , everytime thinking about FOOD. okay , anyway , thanks for being with us girls in the clique , i know we've been irritating but thanks for your crazy-nees also , making everyone hyper and thanks enduring our complaints. jiayous for Os next year , i know you will do well :D

Well , for those other squadmates , all i can say that we are ONE team , we do things together , we go through the thick and thins together , another half a year and we will be stepping down , i hope that we all can make it a fruitful year next year :D

used to it

2010-12-28T20:35:00.001+08:00

YOOOO!!

wassup peoples , few more days to 2011 , who's looking forward to it?
definitely not me , because there will be lots of things popping up next year~
well yesterday was FUN , because we had NPCC bbq!
also wanna thank anthony for coming down and also apologizing at the same time because we broke his umbrella and bullied by us
haha this was a super duper epic part:

me: eh anthony you got watch peter chao?
him: YES OF COURSE! *imitates
fanny: AHHH!! *whacks anthony damm hard

just to warn you peoples , fanny REALLY hates peterchao alot , LOL.
yay had a really really great time with fanny and mariam , sucha pity jv couldnt come , but we shall make it up with teoheng!

Im sorry , the below post is gonna be vulgar , please don read if you cant take it.

This is the first time i felt so angry and humiliated.
when things are going so well , you just came and ruined everything.
tell me , who the fucking hell organised training , and you just interfere it without my fucking permission.
tell me , who the fucking hell insulted us like nobody business and not treating us like what we are supposed to be treated as.
tell me , who the fucking hell , lowered our status and be so fucking humiliated.
you judge us , criticized our teaching , and yet you fucking dont even gave us a chance and just interfere my training without any fucking permission.
how fucking selfish and such a good example you have.
you don even understand how humiliated we felt ,
scolding me for not doing music and yet you fucking accused me.
blame me for not having training , WOW , and not like as if i never fucking go chase after teachers right?
yea , criticizing us like no one's business?
well , all i can say is , since you dont trust us , why dont you might as well take over EVERYTHING.
since you love it so much , then go ahead.
and if you fucking dislike me , the just tell me fucking straight to the face , dont have to waste your effort to bother give sarcastic comments.
i have the rights to stand up for what i want and what is right and what is not being LOOKED DOWN.
i bearing all this for the sake of them , dont even called us children when we are 16 years old next year.
you , have gone too far , far over my limit , i dont care whatever you do to me , i don care whatever consequences im gonna bear , beause i just know that im not a TOOL or anything for you, to INSULT land HUMILIATE like no one's business.
you , just literally stepped on me , my pride , my character , EVERYTHING.
you , are the first ever person to do such things to me and practically exceeding my limit.
sometimes i dont even want you to come back AT ALL.

2010-12-25T10:47:00.004+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!! :DDDDDDDDD

One step at a time~

2010-12-14T18:19:00.001+08:00

/Edited

Had fun day today!
But lets start from yesterday first.
Basically went down to school for some NP stuffs.
me and fanny went to do homework , see such good girls~
alot of funny stuffs happen , shall not elaborate more~

TODAY , was AWESOMMEEEE!
had massive make-up session with fanny , mariam , jievanda and siyya.
drew on here and there on each other's faces.
camwhore here and there too , but lots of unglam pictures.
YEA THANKS JV! SEE I DEDICATE MY THANK YOU TO YOU HERE!~
after makeup i've got two hungry ghost lying on my bed non-stop LOL.
fanny went crazy later on,
she went msn trying to d-siao peoples by recording her laughter , ohmygod.
tomorrow having cca , maybe will blog tomorrow ,
ciaos !~

PIIICKKTUREESS~

Up to you..

2010-12-10T23:13:00.000+08:00

Tag replies:

Tiffany: THANK FOR FLOODING YA!
Fanny: thanks for flooding mamama!!! hehe ^^
Yangkai: CUTE LA U , haha! thanks for tagging anyway! :D

YES , I KNOW MY BLOG HAS BEEN DEAD FOR DECADES!

sorry for upsetting my readers , i just thought that blogging is unnecessary.
well , basically i've changed my skin , i'll TRY to update while i can.
next year will be so hectic , the sky can even fall down!
sorry , been too exaggerate.
well , basically , i had a really fun-enjoyable-awesome-shit holiday ^^
traveled to japan with my fellow peers and shanghai with my beloved famileee.
Frankly speaking there's a total BIG difference between these two countries.
okay , i shall not elaborate more , avoid from offending someone or something.
im SATISFIED , with everything i have now , i don't wish for more , im not selfish kay.
okays , i shall stop here , because i can't crack my brains to think of what's more to write...

so... CIAOSSS!

going through it all

2010-11-05T19:04:00.000+08:00

something stuck my mind ,
lying on the bed going through my thoughts ,
reminiscing the past ,
mistakes which creates guilt in the heart ,
atoning for the sins ,
ready to start over.

Life is always not what we wanted ,
ups and downs , craps and shits ,
but then the choice lies within us.
a big smile can make a difference ,
you don't live to serve people ,
you serve yourself instead.

Different people , different views.
their comments doesn't take you down ,
because they're just plainly jealous.

Attitude , determines ones character.
results doesn't says it all ,
character is what we all are looking for.
be yourself , do the right thing
and that is what its worth.

i ask myself sometimes , do i even have the rights to tell people this , when i'm not even doing it?

No matter what it takes

2010-10-24T13:03:00.001+08:00

SUP peoples , im backk!

Quite a number of things happened during this week , post-exam activities , shopping , results.
so , lets start with monday:

Monday:

Went to school for NP meeting until eleven plus.
did rifle stock check and had a talking session with mr foo.
went to weiting house with siya after that to make sushi !!
totally crazy-ing all the way , and siya keep sampling the food, u and ur FATS.
took 31 to east coast and met xinying and kiansiong on the way.
settle down and way we go into the water~
was totally FUN , thought the water was dirty.
funny thing is , me , xinying and matthieu took turns to bury each other.
the best part was sitting down and back facing the waves and predicting which wave will hit us the hardest.
went up and cleaned ourselves and a full bag of sands was in my ass , DISGUSTING!
had a really awesome day , took bus back with the girl :D

Tuesday:

SHOPPING with aishah , liyana , jv , fanny , tiffany , mariam and yuerong.
TOTALLY AWESOME!!
went to a winter sale near bedok north sec.
the price weren't to my expectations.
went bugis and shop for my hairband!
way too embarrass in the mrt because we were 'arguing' and people were looking at us.
NEO-PRINT with the girls , totally crazy changing places.
cam-whored with fanny's camera while eating.
shopped around bugis street until our legs are toally breaking!!
trained to jurong point to daiso.
shopped for around two hours and chasing mariam.
everyone's leg is totally dead by that time.
bear-ed for awhile and trained back to bedok.
the journey was MARVELOUS.
fanny totally indulge herself in her camera world ,
totally crazy-ing with tiff , mariam and yuerong , talking funny stuffs until we were laughing like shit.
i was totally squeeze to one side when the mrt stopped at one stop and hugging jv , LOL.
dinner with girls at wasabi-san , laughing like crazy again , these girls ah...
hom-ed at eight plus ^^

Wednesday:

Skating at east coast was TIRING.
its been a long time since i skate , totally scared of falling down.
thanks siya and tiffy for accompanying me.
hom-ed after that with tiff , fanny and lynn.
there was one epic part in the bus , more info please consult fanny :D

Thursday:

had our long-awaited japan trip briefing with mr jit.
nothing much and instead he ended up teaching geography -.-
totally looking forward to japan in nov!!
YAY , pierced earhole at tampines with tiffy :D
initially was abit scared and pain , but got alot better after that.
bus-ed to bedok with tiffy while fanny alighted first.
went to shop around for long socks and founded some.
bought our long gloves and hom-ed.

Friday:

Went to toapayoh with jv and fanny to collect prize.
cab-ed with mr phoa and totally crazy-ing with fanny in the cab.
its a NICE trip since mr phoe paid for the cost ^^
lucky we were not late , me and fanny keep spammin jv messages , damm funny!
nugget fanny almost used my hand to touch mr phoa's **** @#$%^&*(
WOOTS , gratz jv , got her fifty bucks cheque.
walking with mr phoe was certainly a very pleasant thing to do.
we were talking about buying cars and how to treat his future girlfriend , LOL.
we are the baddies , coz we kept bullying him.
bus-ed to kallang mrt and trained to lavender with fanny to get her things while jv went home first.

Saturday:

SWMMING with jv , fanny , mariam , tiff , jerrick and jon.
mac-ed at tm first before going swimming.
totally awesome but my swimming still cmi TT
AND, fanny finally go down!!! :DDD
played and fooled around under the water.
nugget jerrick go spit at me , but i got my revenge!
yay , raped jv once and again , thank you , thank you ^^
unfortunately , due to our 'hotness' , there was one pervert keep looking at us , but lucky we've got the boys here.
went to play the slide , trying different kinds of styles going down.
went to deep pool and i totally cant touch the ground , scary~
cleaned up around three plus and went to eat at nearby coffeeshop.
trained to bedok and jon finally treated me ice cream ^^
was using peter chow's voice to irritate fanny on the way , damm funny!
shopped for our socks and hom-ed ~~

Results , what can i say?
i know i put in my best , i know what im doing.
there will always be either disappointment and satisfaction.
but no matter what others look , what others say , in the end , its still YOU.
those who suck up to those have gotten good grades , ditches those who didn't.
those who likes to boast and those who likes to treat people as their target and beat them.
and also those who fear of not getting the highest for certain subjects.
this is how realistic it is , but i just found it funny.
because the conclusion is , the biggest enemy is YOURSELF ,
whether you wan to do it , how your mood or feelings can affect you.
i found it pathetic for those who didnt see this point.
for me , though some weren't up to my expectations , but i wont blame it on anything.
i dont blame teachers , i dont blame my cca , i dont blame student council , i only blame MYSELF.
i learned that time management was important , i learned i need more self practiced , i learned that i should not slack , etc etc.
i learned from my mistakes , before blaming anyone , because i know if others can do it , why cant i?
all in all , i still have some time left , one should not start regret when it's too late.

NOV-DEC holidays list:

holiday structured lesson
japan trip preparation
2011 'o' level emaths and chinese preparation
PDS trainings
NPCC trainings
Promotion test
March camp proposal
Sec 1 orientation camp training
NPCC Combust
NPCC Cross country

These things aint gonna knock me down ,
JIAYOU WEISIN!!~~

there's a long long way to go.. JIAYOU!!

2010-10-17T21:38:00.002+08:00

Tag replies:

Fannyy: HEEE!
Shanleong: nvm la , we MAN ma..
Raymond: okay asap~
Fanny: hai!
Tiffany: miss ya too!
Tiffany: Arigatou!
Fanny: LAZY LOL!
Tiffany: UPDATED!

EXAMS ARE OVERRR!!

I think i just literally flunked all my papers , speechless.
OKAY , lets not talk about papers , it just give me creeps.
well basically , after amath paper on wednesday , went out with my lovely girlfriends.
suppose to went to TM and check out movies , but there were none.
went to tampines safra and played bowling.
LAUGH my head off while cam-whoring with SIYA and girls.
went to east coast while the boys played pool.
i finally go onto the seawall / breakwater !!
thanks to jamie , climb up and sat there staring into the sea.
me and siya were having couple time when suddenly got two helicopters pass by and we were waving at them , LOL.
well , xinying went home first so left me , siya , jamie and SAGGY.
went to play the water and picking up seashells.
got home around six plus , totally worn out.

Last day of oral , went out with NP cliques.
watched the movie: The Child's Eye 3D.
TOTAL AWESOME !!
totally worth it , HIGHLY recommended.
walked around white sands , went popular and remembering the Japanese words and sentence with tiffany.
i told her might as well bring paper and copy everything instead of buying , LOL.
screamed with tiffany again during the movie , like we did when watching haunted changi , lets scream again next time!!! :DDDD
ernest and jerrick were behind us trying to scare us while jonathan trying to spoil the story.
oh god , its suppose to be a scary movie but they make it until so funny and we were laughing throughout.
after the movie ended and all of us were discussing about the ending and trying to figure out, LOL.
sat with tiffany on the bus and we were still trying to list out all the possibilities about the reason of the movie.
me and tiffany ahd concluded that : THERE WILL BE A SECOND PART TO THE MOVIE. ( hope there will be ^^)
had an awesomeeeeee day with these peeps , make my life hype-d up.

Yesterday went swimming with JUPANDA and her sister.
oh gosh , its been a LONG LONG time since i swim.
i think its almost seven years ... , almost a decade.
Nevertheless , we still had a GOOD time.
THANK YOU jv for teaching me how to swim , i know my way of swimming is WEIRD.
YAY , mission accomplished of raping jv , MUAHAHHAHAHA!!
shall do on next satuday and FANNY you BETTER SWIMM!
if not... i call ur jonny carry you into the water, AWWW .. SOO SWEEEETTT!
i think i will die tmr after they see this post , but... WHO CARES ?!! ^^

alright , time to catach up with my animes and dramas!!!
while you guys can admire the pics !!

i love this pic the most!!!

WEISIN MISS FANNY. :(

2010-10-13T21:19:00.000+08:00

WEISIN MISS FANNY!
I MISS HER CUTE FACE!
I MISS HER SHARP VOICE!
I MISS HER HOT BODY!
I MISS FANNYYYYYYYYY~ :(

ANWS.

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IM FANNY. :D
LOL.
I hacked her account. (Y)
JK.
Wei Sin was too lazy to post, so I helped her.
I'm sucha kind soul! :D

2010-09-16T18:37:00.000+08:00

MIA~

for exams..... seeya people!!
MIIS ME (:

Im ready.

2010-09-11T20:08:00.002+08:00

Tag replies:

Fanny: HEHE , of course!
Siyya: OMG! you totally . . . .
Siyya: thuanks!
Fanny: O_O
jamie: thank you thank you (:
Siyaa: LOLLL!
Fanny: wellcomeee~~

GYM workout today with fanny and jv with her sis.
totally awesome because i burned alot of calories , LOL.
met fanny at bustop and all i saw is a girl running towards me with a bleeding leg.
omigosh , fanny , you better get well soon so we can go swimming , aye?
met up with jv and then went to tampines gym.
quite awkward at first because it was mostly guys , but don't worry , you get use to it soon enough.
i started off with treadmill first.
damn shiok , i was running like a mad woman until my hair flying all over the place.
i was practically competing with a woman beside me and keep increasing the speed.
after that , tried on the cycling machine and one more.
basically had lots of fun and fanny singing non stop while doing.
left around at one , ate lunch near jv's house.
fanny totally talking non-stop when eating and jv face sooo serious O_O.
thank you jv for walking us to the bustop.
train-ed to paya lebar with fanny.
and once again we step into this fashion.
the clothes damn freaking nice and its really tempting me.
i think im gonna spend huge sum of money on clothes :D
walked around and bus home.

Get ready for the battle , victory awaits.

2010-09-10T18:24:00.007+08:00

AHH~~ i found this really true and i think it applies to all of us right??!!

Always happy and never a frown on your face
No one knows the real you
Why don't you just be yourself?
What are you afraid of?
Is it really that hard to see the real you?
I know that everyday can't be sunny
There must be some days that may seem funny
Bad things do happen to good people
Just relax and let it all hang out
Be yourself
by Evelina Robinson

Life is just simply too short for sadness , worries , anger , hatred ,
why don't we just get on and live happily and make it worthwhile?
why bother to make ourself miserable when you doesn't shows it?
Is it even worth it tormenting ourself?
Might as well Just get on with life no matter what happens.
TRY IT even if it just once ,
you'll never know how it feels like if you just sit there and do nothing ,
and that's when you do things that isn't worth it at all.
make it happen and cherish every moment you have ,
think of those unfortunate and realized how lucky you are.

Everyone is experiencing the same thing , who doesn't?
which is why we are all humans.
it's our life , the decision lies in our hands.
No one cares whether you are sad , so might as well be happy ,
at least we know we existed , at least we make everything worthwhile.

I don't care what you think , none of my damn business

2010-09-07T19:48:00.000+08:00

tag replies:

Tiffany: LOL , hehe , thanks !
Tiffany: LOL , hehe true true~
Jamie: YOHOO COW!
Fanny: you want zu nao dan!
Weiting: thanks SAGGY!
Tiffany: oh , coz i realised the previous skin yr use before liao , so i change another one (:
Siyya: yesh!!~

CIAO CIAO~~

Kbox today with fanny , jievanda , mariam and jonathan was AWESOME!!
met up at bedok interchange and then took bus 14 to katong shopping mall.
totally went crazy in the bus and fanny up to her tricks again.
reached katong , was pretty full of maid agencies.
walked about and saw teoheng!
Karaoke there was cheap and the room wasn't that bad.
picked songs , grab our mics and sang all our hearts out!
especially when we got off tune , but who cares!!
had a great 3-hr singing session and went to summer frost while jon went home.
the ice cream there so nice!!
thank you jv for lending me money.
after that we went to marine parade and window shopped.
saw alot of things , especially the clothes damn nice , but the price even more nicer.
went to watsons and tried alot of things , LOL.
bought bbt and hom-ed.
had a really awesome day with peeps , really sang my heart out and forget all the troubles , i really really had a great day.
more challenges up ahead , lets strive for the best :D

The naked truth is always better than the best-dressed lie. -Ann Landers

I will not look back , I will not care

2010-09-05T13:51:00.000+08:00

tag replies:

weiting: LOLOLOL , saggy~~
jamie: nope ^^
siya: LOL! of course! she wants to see our panic state.
siya: ehek! sadist~~
Tiffany: HAI ti-fen-neee
Fanny: go die la you! i know you want him~
Siya: hehe
Fanny: siao za bor!
Tiffany: updated! XD

CIAOSUUU~

common test finally over , sayonara~
but , we still got final year exams TT.

Friday:

Last day of common test!
had amath paper , im sure i did alright , maybe just a pass because i've got a careless mistake.
after test was emath.
boring shit , nobody wants to get involve with common test papers anymore.
PE , was awesome with volleyballs.
Mr ho hit the ball that flew like rocket and make us all stunned until i dropped on the floor.
recess , me , xinying , weiting and siya desperate for the food inside the vending machine.
because the food inside is going to drop anytime and our eyes were like : O_O.
after recess followed by english.
was funny because abner kept dsiao-ing here and there and make mr teo laugh.
ft period , vote for class outing for end of year.
i hope we can go to the zoo because our class is full of animals XD.
and a farewell to miss tan , we will miss you loads , make sure when you come back to bv must teach our class.
friday's parade we had UG games.
congrats to all UG groups who participate in the game and completed sucessfully :D
OMG , jerrick totally changed alot , wore and shades and pose ~
dinner at mac with the usuals after that.

Saturday:

woke up early , went for changkat primary for exhibition.
super duper tired , my brain is not functioning well enough.
met peeps at simei mrt and walk to changkat primary.
there were quite a few number of schools.
went there and practice pds and introducing to parents and students too.
lunch at banquet , me and tiffany went to tm to watch haunted changi after that.
omg , the movie was boring , was not even scary at all except where theres a part a face of a female pop out smiling at the camera.
the only cool part was the camera detected three headless man and it was so omg.
the movie lasted for an hour plus, omg waste my money TT.
took bus 69 and hom-ed.

PICTURES!

2010-08-25T21:15:00.001+08:00

MIA

Will be back soon~~
CIAO!~

How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours. ~Wayne Dyer

2010-08-19T20:21:00.001+08:00

Tag replies :

Jonathan: O.O, LOL , you should go with fanny ^^
Jonathan: siao ar you! want me die isit?!
jamie: heheh , thanks my darl!
Fanny: LOLOL , yeah man , go for your jonny.
Fanny: LOL , cannot meh? you where not happy?!
Jamie: yeah , thanks ! <3
Fanny: LOL , thats why!
Siya: I-Z-A-Y-A KUNNNN!!!~

TEST TEST TEST TEST TEST!
I'm going crazy because of you!

Common test 2 in less than 2 weeks , i'm so dead.
great that i can concentrate on my studies without touching my laptop,
MUST RESIST THE TEMPTATION!
anyway , back to school.
today morning had a really delicious breakfast.
tuna + egg + bread +coffee.
coffee really works on me , keeps me awake throughout the day.
lesson was fine as usual.
yay , finally the microphone is on our table and the camera filming us :D
chinese class , ohmygod.
mr phoa talking about 'o' level chinese results , makes me worry now.
and jamie stop vomiting , dont be like weiting sagged all the way through ISH ,LOL.
Amath test after that , i hope i dont screw up , now even that i do questions i will think about siya scolding me , ARIGATOU SENSEI!
recess , nothing much , discussing amath answers all the way.
physics was a boredom , nothing much.
emath was okay , nothing much too.
Geography = EPIC.
My god , it was totally damm retarded.
we were having 5 min of geo test , when we left about 1 min left ,
miss farhanah suddenly said: Okays guys , you have 1 min to check your answers from the textbook.
The next minute , everyone panicked and starting to grab their textbooks.
ROFL! , i bet miss farhanah was laughing too , seeing our epic expression.
after school had emath remedial.
Im sure this is the best remedial i ever had and also the first time i laugh until so hardddd.
Mr ho expression never fails to make people laugh.
I tried to imitate him and in the end made everyone laugh and mr ho almost hit me with his paper! LOL.
Dont know whats wrong with siya , she started video-ing.
AND AND AND , she and i almost ......
LOL! the video super funny with our expressions.
lastly , thanks to abner , our class is called sag3n4.(inside joke)
AND abner really look like zheng qiao bin :D